You question what it is. Is it a really good day? The art of coming out of the dark? The fact that I’m starting to feel better? Getting joy out of existence. Taking in each part of every day, living in it and loving it.
Am I paying too much attention? Overanalyzing? Combing through the details and noticing every single thing? This over analytical approach I’m currently taking is making me think is this mania, the increased energy, the shopping, the unquenchable desire to find secret treasures. The excitement and satisfaction that I have when I secure what I’m searching for but the unfulfilling sensation that’s lingering.
What’s going on? Where am I? How do I classify this? Am I trying to put myself in a labeled box when there is no box and no label to affix?
Can I have a great weekend without thinking more of it than what it appears to be?
Why do I always have to over analyze myself and my actions? Is it the need to have an explanation for each and everything that I do, think, say?
Is it routed in fear that my stability is in jeopardy? That the medication change and reduction is already in the works and I’m feeling it with an intensity that words can not begin to describe?
Good day? Better than normal day? Heightened and elevated mood day?
So very many questions, so very few answers.