You know depression is settling in when:
- You feel the weight of the air on your body.
- That lukewarm tired feeling, like having a low-grade fever.
- Feeling bad enough to not feel like yourself but not bad enough to call in sick from work.
- Experiencing the feeling of sadness but being unable to cry.
- Looking in the mirror and seeing the empty void that is hiding deep in your eyes.
- Knowing that there’s so much that needs to be completed but being unable to get off the couch.
- Constantly running late due to lacking the motivation to get out of the house.
- Being tired but when it’s time to sleep, staring at the ceiling with eyes wide open.
- Wanting to write on your blog, but no words come to your finger tips
- Caring less about what you wear and your appearance, all the while longing to be in your pajamas
I spent a week with massive amounts of energy and then I crashed.
The crash landing was not horrible, but it did land me in a place that was lower than where I feel comfortable. I wake up each day hoping that the dark clouds drifted away while I struggled to sleep the night prior.
The grey clouds are still lingering and I am wondering when the sun will shine brightly again. I make my lists of what needs to be accomplished each day to keep me on track, but it’s hard to keep hitting override, to keep pushing, to keep persevering. Alas, I will pull myself up by my bootstraps and I will saddle up for what’s to come.