I often feel like my boot is stuck in the mud. I can’t seem to wiggle it free so I stand there. I usually start to cry. I know I can step out of my boot and be free, muddy but free, but I want my boot, both of them and I want to be… Continue reading Keep Going
Tag: manic
Sunday Babbles 5/12/2019
Friday has come and gone. And there was not a babble that was recorded due a mental day off that was in place. I did much of nothing on Friday. Had breakfast, saw my family on their way to work and school and then took a much-needed restorative nap. Upon waking, I headed out and… Continue reading Sunday Babbles 5/12/2019
Song and Dance
It’s when you are sitting, perhaps waiting in a sitting area for your windshield to be replaced or sitting at your breakfast table drinking your morning cup of coffee. There’s this feeling surging through your legs that makes it feel like you need to breakout in song and dance. To start high kicking and line… Continue reading Song and Dance
Mania: The Blanket Monster
They sit on the floor of her bedroom, over by the corner of the bed. There’s a blanket over her head and she is crying. It has been another poor day. Another day of unexplained moodiness and temper tantrums. She describes it as feeling the emotions come up from her toes and then burst out… Continue reading Mania: The Blanket Monster
Just a good day or something more?
You question what it is. Is it a really good day? The art of coming out of the dark? The fact that I’m starting to feel better? Getting joy out of existence. Taking in each part of every day, living in it and loving it. Am I paying too much attention? Overanalyzing? Combing through the… Continue reading Just a good day or something more?
The Fight: Depression and Anxiety
I lay on my bed and think, while my head is buried in my pillow. I think about forcing myself to get my body out of my bed and how much I really didn’t want to, not one single ounce of me wants to “wake up”. I set a time limit for how long I’m… Continue reading The Fight: Depression and Anxiety
Medical Withdrawal
Friday afternoon I sat on the couch that was opposite my doctor. She looked at my file (large, filled with numerous pages depicting my numerous visits). She looked up and said, if you are back this soon, something must not be going very well. I sighed (I hate sighing, I hate when others sigh, but… Continue reading Medical Withdrawal
What I’ve gained: Part Two
I see my psychiatrist this afternoon after a month since my last appointment. I do not clearly remember the last time I was able to go an entire month without seeing my doctor. For the last two years, I have seen her more than I have seen my friends and family, nearly every one to… Continue reading What I’ve gained: Part Two
If you are happy and know it…
I am going to go out on a ledge and proclaim that it is a universal goal to be happy. Or that more often than naught, people would prefer to be happy over being sad, angry, disappointed, and many other negatively charged emotions. I know that I prefer to be happy versus being sad. I… Continue reading If you are happy and know it…